Who Is Callie?

I am "The Full Monty"- Vibrant, Educated, Articulate, Twisted. Absinthe Drinker, Diverse and Sensual,. World Travel Freak, Guiness Beer Drinker, Simplistic and Flirt! Lover of Life, Trying To Keep The Flow, On a Journey unknown. Won’t you Join Me?

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  • Friday, January 23, 2009

    Hey all, just wanted to take a moment to say things are "hopeful" since the job incident. I was if anything to say the least upset and going through some things you know. But after the first day I seemed to get better with it and had already started planning. Therefore check out my latest thoughts on what I could do.

    1. Mail order bride. Dude- in some countries I can get 2 goats and a chicken. BUT because i am callie, and worth alot more, perhaps someone will throw in a cow and some pigs along with the goats and chickens and whaddya know? Millionaire dowry in effect.

    2. Truck Drivin Momma- I can learn to drive those big azz trucks and learn to sidewipe a few vehicles while i am at it. That would be kool. So be on the lookout for me to honk my tweeter at you on the highway sometime.

    3. Army- I did go and talk to the recruiter on yesterday. It was a good conversation but he kept repeating something that kinda got me wonderin... he kept saying- "You are scaring me. Your so quiet and reserved." and with that- I felt it an opportune time to perhaps lighten his fear and I asked him- "I am not trying to be crass- but do I have to take all of my piercings out for basic?" with that he kinda stuttered in speech and whatever he was writing, and glanced at me. "How many do you have?" "I mean, you don't look like a pin cushion." "I mean, how long have they been in?" "I mean, yes....for the time being..." "By the way, where are they located?" "Your a hell raiser aren't you?"

    yep..I can see me now...... Private Benjamin......

    4. Waffle House Diva- no seriously, I can learn to swing a spatula and yell "Give me a slab of cow burn it and paint it yellow and graze the field pronto!" In lamens terms- Cheeseburger well done all the way. Life is grand.

    5. Hooters Girl- I can be the first curvy Hooters girl. And get this- My hooters won't need a push up bra because I have enough to fill Dolly Partons depending on the time of the month, AND I dont have to wear those pantyhose because I already come complete with a tan. HOLLA!

    6. A cafe Barista- errrr at Dunkin Doughnuts- Lurve it.

    7. A bartender- I can see me doing that. Coyote Ugly here I come!

    8. A Maid- a sexy one- cleaning stuff...only without the high heels because 3 hours in it I am pissed. Just give me my Keds.

    9. A Phone Actress- yeah...errr lemme think on that for a year or two.

    10. The Dancing Chik Fil A cow by the side of the road. I can do that. Maybe even break it down with a little Moonwalk, the robot. If anything no one will know it's me AND I would get free waffle fries and lemonade. Classic!

    Yo! I am still here. Still me.....still callie.... Werd to ya murthaz.