Who Is Callie?

I am "The Full Monty"- Vibrant, Educated, Articulate, Twisted. Absinthe Drinker, Diverse and Sensual,. World Travel Freak, Guiness Beer Drinker, Simplistic and Flirt! Lover of Life, Trying To Keep The Flow, On a Journey unknown. Won’t you Join Me?

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  • Wednesday, April 04, 2007

    It was 6am in the morning and I was told the night before that I had to be induced because you were having or going through fetal distress and my blood pressure was high.
    Prior to all of this let's look at how you came to be in my life.

    I found out I was pregnant around 4 weeks after conception... Right after the confirmation I was extremely sick. I could not stop throwing up. I had never been pregnant and relied on what other women had told me- that morning sickness was normal for a while..Eat crackers, drink ginger ale..rest... And yet with you, I was doing it 24 hours a day 7 days a week. After 2 weeks of this it got to a point that I could only hold down mashed potatoes.. When I could no longer do that I was rushed to the emergency room. The Doctor rushed me upstairs where they strapped monitor devices all over me and on you... They told me I was suffering from Hyperemisis and that I was basically miscarrying- that it would be a matter of time. In the meantime they admitted me and told me they had to put fluids back into my body. They asked me how long it had been since I slept.. I cried and told them 2 weeks... I couldn't stop throwing up and please not to let you die. I woke up 3 days later listening to your heartbeat through a monitor and tv screen.

    5 months- I was having such a hard time with other things that it affected heavily on my carrying you... I was diagnosed instead of Post Partum Depression as having clinical depression. I prayed. I never took the medication they gave me. I prayed. I asked God to remove the bad that was happening and to bring us both through this.... 2 days later your dad was shipped off to the Middle East- and I had a dream... A lady was standing in a pool of water so crystal blue that it was nothing that I have ever seen. She whispered to me, to not be afraid, that you were the one.....

    6months- You and I defined the word DELI....Food was awesome! You were picky as hell though. No canned foods of any kind. I had to get everything from the farmers market... But you sure craved a Deli sub and potato salad ALOT....You also craved salt...which in turn had me drinking tons of Olive Juice and Pickle Juice from the jar...

    I read to you... I sang to you...I talked to you... One moment that still plays in my mind and I was fortunate to keep on video tape was during an ultrasound appointment. I took a musical globe that I often played for you... When I saw you on the screen I played the music and placed the ball on my tummy...I took my finger and traced your little face, and at that same moment you took your little hand and raised it upwards to where I was touching.... My heart and spirit soared.

    8th month- You and and I were in a very bad car accident. My car was totalled and I went into early labor. The doctors told me it was still early and they would do what they could. I was dilated 3 centimeters. They gave me drugs upon drugs to stop the contractions.... I was in the hospital for a week, praying and crying...relying on the dream that comforted me... The contractions stopped.

    April 3, 1995- I was told that you were in fetal distress and that my blood pressure was to high and that I needed to be induced. I was told that an emergency team would also be on hand . I went home and packed... I sat down in the tub that evening and you and I had a long talk. I also left a Last Will and Testament handy in the event that anything happened. Deep inside I felt I did not need one, but the Hospital recommended it..... I stayed awake that night...

    April 4, 1995- 6 am. I was at the hospital admissions desk filling out my paperwork. I was then taken to my room. It was beautiful.. I changed into my gown and laid in the bed as the nurses came to do my blood pressure, and other vitals. I was then given a shot to start the inducing of my labor... I was terrified. I started to cry and asked God to give me peace- a moment later a mid wife walked in and asked me if I was afraid. I told her yes. She told me not to be, that I would do and be fine.

    9am- Grandma shows up and is on my last nerve *smiles*
    9:30 am- my water breaks and I am in tears from the pain. The pain is so bad that I noticed after all was said and done, I bent the bed rail from grabbing onto it.

    12:00 pm- The emergency team is called in and yells something about having to get me to start pushing. Monitors are going off wildly, beeping noises , people rushing here and there. They tell Grandma she has to move away from my bed. They place an oxygen mask on me as they lay my bed flat. I am then told that I need to push..... and I do.... I continue and continue until I hear you cry.... and the Doctors voice- "Arrival time- 12:23pm "....... They took you away and checked you out. They had given me a sedative and told me that I still needed the oxygen. A nurse finally brought you to me... I took you in my arms and kissed you on your little head...You started sucking your hand.... I told the nurse I could not hold you long because I was so tired....Grandma of course took the honors...and I slept.....

    I look back on all of this today..... Your day.... I can count on one hand how many times I have had to spank you... As you have never given me many problems or issues.... I look at how you have grown and how handsome you are. A honor roll student.A compassionate young man... You are 12 today.....In 5 years you will be gone..On your own.... I am still learning how to be a single parent... May I just say that you are the biggest joy in my life??? I am so blessed and honoured to have been chosen to carry you, and nurture you into the man, the leader that you are meant to be..... I will save the mommy advice for next year...... Today if anything I want you to know that I Love you, I am proud of you, and God Loves you...You have a purpose... We have gone through alot you and I....Your path is and will be continuously be revealed each day....And I will be with you always..... Today my dearest son, on this day- The Angels sang when you were born.... They still sing for you....

    Happy Birthday!
    mom