Who Is Callie?

I am "The Full Monty"- Vibrant, Educated, Articulate, Twisted. Absinthe Drinker, Diverse and Sensual,. World Travel Freak, Guiness Beer Drinker, Simplistic and Flirt! Lover of Life, Trying To Keep The Flow, On a Journey unknown. Won’t you Join Me?

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  • Friday, October 19, 2007

    Things People..I am understanding in knowing...Basically today- I am learning alot...example-
    1. Old people cannot drive...And I am not talking about just old people- I am talking about the ones where the ladies wear every piece of jewelry they own with slathered green or blue eyeshadow on their eyes and then dunk themselves in either BenGay or Tabu perfume...I am talking about the old men that wear the shorts like Urkle with knee highs and the sock strap showing.....Bless their hearts..They cannot drive... Go forward- they go in reverse. Park in a parking space- they park in three...geez.
    2. I am stuck on Band Aid cause Band Aid is stuck all over me. literally. doctor visits. I got pricked and prodded in all areas on yesterday. I look as if I had an accident with the needle as my arms are swollen and blue.... I am typing this with 2 band aid fingers people. Show my some Lurve.
    3. Regardless of how some people feel about movie stars, singing stars *coughs Brittney Spears* there will always be someone that is totally in love with them. another example- Kid Rock...all I see is -slimy...but alas some buxom false tittied women will see "hottie"....
    4. I have a zit....on my ass....I know....it's weird..but there it is....just there...I cannot decide to bust it or not...so for now- I just apply a hot compress... and pray that it goes down...well..not that anyone is looking at my butt- but it's annoying to me ya know?
    5. Women love *stuff*...I try not to be a clutterholic, but I have once again accumulated *stuff*....and isn't major...it's just stuff that I think is important- but really isn't...but...it's important....*stuff*
    6. Men have a bodily tool that allows them to pee straight, direct, and if need be can draw their name in snow..and yet they cannot for the love of all that is Holy, pee into the toilet....Riddle.Me.That.
    7. Having a BBQ meal should mean that you have the basic staples of BBQ flair...BBQ, bread...potato salad...corn on the cob...things of that nature....However I have had it slapped in my face that here in Georgia- BBQ comes with stew- that they call Brunswick stew- in which to me- all of those side items are thrown together in a soup like base...and that is BBQ fit for a King....Ok...shawty...I don't know where the hell you all came up with that- but in the hood at the BBQ's I know- not only do we have side items of Cole Slaw- Salads, watermelon and banana pudding- BUT we also play dominoes and spades with our weapons proudly displayed on the table. And then that waitress had the nerve to plop my plate on the table with no sauce on it! what??? She told me I could apply my own sauce....*ack*
    8. Gas station attendants can own a gas station, and not know directions...Instead you are told by pointing gestures to buy a map...
    9. David Copperfield is under investigation by the Feds for sexual misconduct? Really? Do you think he will make himself disappear? I'm just askin yo.
    10. I recommend the Godiva chocolate drink from the above brand new Chevron Mart. It really tastes like a melted bar of their chocolates. and it's chilled...yum....but...I know that one is enough because my stomach does not agree with artificially pumped cows milk. I need the real deal.
    So...Whadda ya know today?