That's right Peoples... I met the Beast on Saturday and Cried...And what pray tell would make the Beauty cry...I shall begin this tale of woe from the beginning. So grab some coffee or whatever, cop a squat and read on.....

You see, it started last Friday when my aunt came to visit me for lunch..She then presented to me the Willie Wonka excitement tickets of Six Flags over Georgia. 4 of those to be exact... In turn I generously suprised my son and the other boys and decided, Saturday let's make a day of it... Now- there is something magical when escorting 3 teens around a theme park- skipping down a hill arm in arm with tweety bird and sylvester the cat... It was like- being a kid who thrived on Sugar smacks and bubble gum...All that was missing was the little birds swarming around my head....First- we decided to do a roller coaster called the Cyclone..I like that..It is kinda small but not really, very smooth ride and makes you feel like you are on a slide....No problema.... We then decided to do another roller coaster in which we were turned upside down, alot- while standing...That was ok.....no problema... We get on the log flume and get semi wet...sloshed around for a moment...And then...that music started...In my head.....ya know that one....

JAWS....the theme...started playing in my head as all of us stopped at one roller coaster and just stared..... It was...Huge....It was....long......and...errr...it was huge..... We are all staring at this thing, and listening to the people scream by us- and hesitantly we all agreed to ride on it...... The closer we got in the line- *which moved fast by the way* the more hesitant I became...... And that music...you know the one??? JAWS theme...started to play louder and faster...and then it was our turn........

First of all people...I will admit I am a speed junkie...Cars. bikes...thrills..I love it...HOWEVER- there comes a point in an adults life- where I think we need to re-evaluate the traumas we put our bodies through...Hence the next episode...Keep reading....

We get into our seats which resemble a 2 seater love sofa... My son and Juan are in front of Luis and myself....People...where was the little strap in belts and all that???? There aren't any! There is only a in between your crotch lap bar..... Oh- I should have known something was up when the little attendent person came to me and said: Maam, your gonna have to take your flip flops off and leave them on the counter...they will fly off....... say what???? Ok...so...my dumb ass- hands her my flip flops and I look at Luis, and Luis has turned 5 shades of white..Ghost white. beyond dead white...... Onward....this machine starts moving... Slowly....kinda...moving...Up a hill...a steep ass hill......

Halfway point- I start to see all of atlanta, probably Tennessee and South Carolina also.....I look over at Luis, and he looks at me and says:

Ms. Callie????? Are you alright.????
I look at him and all braveness has left me like Elvis leaving the building! I look at him and say...

"Nooooooooooooo.." and start to cry like the bitch I am....And ya wanna see why????? I gathered this from the internet just to show you what I was looking at on the FIRST DROP:



FACTS: about this bullshit:
Cresting the 200-foot lift hill, Goliath begins a stomach loosing
17 story drop at 70 mph
For airtime lovers there should be plenty to be found as the trains ride a series of zero-gravity hills and drops.....all at 70 mph.... There were a total of 7 of these drops at different heights at the same speed...
170 feet-First,175 feet-Second,129 feet-Third,118-feet Fourth,79 feet-Fifth,56 feet-Sixth,48 feet-Seventh............

FUNK.THAT.NOIZE. People! If you are a beaver use your teeth to hold on to whatever you can grab...Now it explains why they took my flip flops, and why I saw dentures in cups and all kinds of articles that can possibly *fly-away*........ People..My body just cannot handle that kind of stress anymore....No shame...I cried like a bitch the whole time! My snot may have hit someone behind us..I did not care! Poor Luis had never been to an amusement park such as this- and he may never go again..He was done...He tried to explain to his other relatives from guatamala what he was feeling by camera phone, but I don't think they comprehended it very well, because after wards, I was holding him up- while trying to hold myself up- and look somewhat presentable as I went to gather my flip flops- because after all- I ended up looking like I ran into Tammy Faye Baker on accident....

Another Shot:


yeah...I think we shimmied around this curve fast enough to hurl a vomit ball or two for extra effect......Needless to say- the rest of the day- or shall I say 10 hours- was pretty easy in deciding what we wanted to ride and would not ride...I no longer rode the other coasters, as I was content for the day. The boys decided to do a few more tamer ones, and then we all stuck with the water rides, and the little kiddie haunted house...So what! Laugh at me peoplez. I don't care....There is no shame in that....

Continue snickering away....I did however notice a nice little reminder... As I was stepping out of the shower and hiked my leg to dry off I noticed bruises...Blue bruises between my thighs....Yeah- either I was riding an imaginary bull or I was squeezing the heck out of the crotch buster...........The things we do for our kids and for ourselves for a thrill people.

I.Am.Done.
proceed to laugh.......

callie