Who Is Callie?

I am "The Full Monty"- Vibrant, Educated, Articulate, Twisted. Absinthe Drinker, Diverse and Sensual,. World Travel Freak, Guiness Beer Drinker, Simplistic and Flirt! Lover of Life, Trying To Keep The Flow, On a Journey unknown. Won’t you Join Me?

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  • Thursday, October 05, 2006

    Howdy Ho Neighbor! it is Thursday and I am so glad because Momma has been tired of the rat race lately....

    Question- Explain to me how is that you pay close to 50 dollars for a good bra, only to have the material give? Women buy bras at that expense for support and control...Yeah its your basic ugly white grandma bra- but hey I bought these bras to support my boobs underneath my clothes... I shouldnt have to wash my hands in the restroom and stare in the mirror only to see my boobs looking like they are conjoined twins....... Darn you Hanes makers- cotton people....Get some better grade cotton material to produce better bras! Maybe a few of them should go out and pick cotton for a day, I bet their butts will value that lesson and will stop being cheap in labor.

    Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh- my gosh... Ok this is gross...... I go into the *private* bathroom yesterday after lunch.....Apparently lunch got a hold of someone because I walked in, and walked out... I did the about face with no double time people..... Someone funked it up sooooooooo bad, and not only that- they didnt even do a Courteousy Flush!!!! Ok.....let me break this down to you...I do not think guys concern themselves with issues like this, and perhaps some women do not either- but I do.... I am very particular about certain things.....

    I do not float air biscuits in public.... (queef) *women queef- men fart
    I do not use public restrooms to do number 2 (unless it is an extreme emergency- which happened on a one hand occassion after doing a colon cleanse late in the day.)
    I am a squatter and I always check behind me after I finish to clean up any messes.
    I carry a small purse size of all natural air freshner with me when I go to a public restroom....

    When people come to my residence- they are in a comfortable place to use the restroom. I have magazines, and a city newspaper, candles, incense- the whole nine yards.. Hell I keep cleaning materials in view also- in the event they need to wipe or clean a spill...... The restrooms here have some of those materials I listed also.... There should be NO REASON for someone to have to come behind a person and their eyes well up with tears because you did not feel like spraying or lighting an incense or what have you.... AND most importantly you should never leave track marks... If you are having a wing ding of a time on the crapper, you have to flush after a rough dose and then proceed......

    *Dose Dose- Flush Flush*

    C'mon America! Help a sister out.... Look, I was only in there for a complete millisecond and saw the ring around the bowl...It was so much crap left over- it looked like a semi had pulled on its breaks to avoid hitting someone. It was NAZTY! so...from now on.....and you dont have to admit you have or do it, just from now on, know that there are people like me that will Jackie Chan you on the blog for being a *Track Marker*..and you dont get a medal for that.

    *composure regroup*

    What...*laughs* what is it about the hair weaves these ladies are plucking in these days in all of those bright colors???? I was driving home yesterday and could not help but laugh- but this lady (who I think was a prostitute- I didnt stop to ask) anywho- she had on these blue jean shorts showing all of her booty and vagina pretty much, and a tank top showing her boobs, and all of this long stringy weave- cascading all over her in colors of Purple, Blue and Yellow.......Keep in mind she was black as night, and she waved at me as I was staring- and she had no front top two teeth..... Mercy Me..... Bless her heart she looked like rainbow bright, as she sashayed down the road waving at people............ If your a hooker, at least take into consideration the type of clientale you want......Look trashy- you will pick up the garbage man..... Look classy- you pick up the rich man. *smiles*

    Yeah- thats right.. I am a glorified hooker.. I am a hooker to society.. I sell my self out to corporate america and I get screwed often without the vaseline mind you.. I can at least admit it.... *laughs*

    So- here is your thought for the day-

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    I am sooooooooooooooo placing an order for this bra! *winks*