Who Is Callie?

I am "The Full Monty"- Vibrant, Educated, Articulate, Twisted. Absinthe Drinker, Diverse and Sensual,. World Travel Freak, Guiness Beer Drinker, Simplistic and Flirt! Lover of Life, Trying To Keep The Flow, On a Journey unknown. Won’t you Join Me?

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  • Wednesday, February 27, 2008

    Nada people. I got. Nada. I have some things going on at work that require my attention today therefore I have no interesting news to tell you all.... Ummm one day I will be able to throw you all for loop ya know? Just to keep everyone on their toes. Like say errrrr.. Me having a baby....or getting married.....or got laid.....or...heck something worthy........ Alas, I will leave you with a few random thoughts before burying myself in paper snatch. How bout that?
    1. The bathroom bandit and I are gonna throw the heck down people. Not only did they leave more shit tracks in the toilet, they left one of the little brown kids in the pool. I gagged and ran out and threw up in the other bathroom way down in no mans land.
    2. I noticed in the headlines where crack head Bobbie Brown was caught with cocaine on his persons and now has agreed to do community service by helping children. Riiiiggggght.....
    3. Dazd. why you no tell me RockBand was way cooler than guitar hero? Since my son announced to his friends that I suck at playing the guitar they have officially nominated me as the singer. Thanks to me- they passed all of the levels. I sang the hell out of Soundgarden and murmured my way through a rendition of the Beastie Boys and did such a great job at practicing run on sentences that it still gave me an "awesome rating" . show me some lurve homie.
    4. Hollywood Video is closing its doors and I took advantage of buying my favorite movie for 7.49 people.. Bond...James Bond's Casino Royale. werd.
    5. I found a real cute boobie blouse to wear for my party Friday. It's so cute. as will I be.
    6. It's funny how when watching movies of some big name people how in each of their movies they do a particular thing that they are known for. example- The Rock...he now has to always do that eyebrow thing or a bodyslam thingy. Angelina Jolie, now has to pout in every movie and do it alot more forceful. Mark Wahlburg. He has that famous pimp daddy walk that just has me climbing the freakin walls. I so dig him....no....truly dig him.......pimp walk on with your fyne self!
    7. Someone and I won't mention his name but I am sure it was my son, decided to go into my bathroom and steal my toilet paper. Little did I know when I reached to grab some it was gone which meant I had to "drip run through the house to his bathroom" to reclaim it. I am sure I was dry by the time I got back to my toilet.
    8. I am in dire need of warmer weather. and yes Pele. I will bitch and whine. sue me. No wait, don't do that- I don't have anything.
    9. The guy sitting in front of me waiting for his client is wearing a horrid toupee'. It's kind of slanted to one side and then the back of it is raised high enough that you can see the separated portion of his real hair line. I wanna offer him a comb so bad or try and fix it.
    10. And yet....I am busting a gut from snickering yo!
    and I leave you all with this:
    Two hookers were walking down the street. Hooker number 1 says:
    "Gurrrrl! We gonna get PAID tonight! I can smell dick in the air!"
    the other hooker laughed and said: "Gurl quit trippin, I just belched."
    I know..I am sick. but ya lurve me long time yo!