Who Is Callie?

I am "The Full Monty"- Vibrant, Educated, Articulate, Twisted. Absinthe Drinker, Diverse and Sensual,. World Travel Freak, Guiness Beer Drinker, Simplistic and Flirt! Lover of Life, Trying To Keep The Flow, On a Journey unknown. Won’t you Join Me?

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  • Thursday, February 07, 2008

    OK...because I have crossed paths of Linda Blair on yesterday to Dorothy of the Wizrd of Oz today- I am just re-affirming that "Hey- it's all gravy!" Needless to say that ole' boy did see yesterdays blog and was he evah pissed!!! Good! That I think will teach him a lesson if anything in who to mess around with. skeezer.

    Alas, today is thursday, my life in the realm and outside of the realm has been hellacious at best and yet I am still here yo! I am tired of the dreary weather, my body craves ocean winds and sun. Lots of Sun....Turn your ass black as coal sun....I want sun..I want beach..I want sand between my hot pink painted toe nails with a toe ring! I want a bottle of wine chilled with a side order of crab legs and fried alligator tails. I want lemon pepper boiled shrimp and an ice chilled margarita with sugar and salt lacing the rim.

    I want people that own dogs that are white as cotton to buy some doggie wipes and wipe their ass after they take a dump! People..I kid you not....I see this lady each morning on my way to work that owns not 1- not 2- but 3 of those bichon dogs that are white as snow- with the exception of their butts. It is caked in poo. and I know when they get home -Sally Jesse Raphael, and the Olson twins are rubbing their butts on carpet trying to do it themselves... bless their hearts......they cannot continue to be prissy if they are caked in poo. Trust!

    I want netflix to stop sending me emails asking if I got a movie when I sent it back and filled out the questionaire 500 times......

    I want the IRS and Social Security to recognize me so I can be Queen for a day.

    I want a massage and a wrap of some sort where they squeeze me like a grape so I can be 15 pounds thinner.

    I want a new hair color besides my natural dark auburn.

    I want... I want....I think I am having another panic of mid life crisis... Ya know a blog whore will be 38 at the beginning of March. I found my first gray hair and cut that bitch out with a pair of scissors with a quickness! My boobs have dropped another degree below... although still perky, they are beginning to sag. No amount of crunches is making me look like Angelina Jolie- and no amount of bike riding is giving me that toned sleek look. Instead I seem to be getting buffer and more solid which is leading me to think I am inhaling steroids in my oatmeal or something. *sighs*

    Ok..so......what to do you ask? Well how bout today we take a walk down memory lane! How bout today along with your great and noble comments that you give me a song to play in the DJ booth and we just have ourselves a virtual pick my ass up off the floor party?

    My first pick....Is just for my friend That Guy who is serving his time in Italy......Dude, years ago they said "White Men Couldn't Jump"- but this guy made up for it when he stole someones song to rap!

    "Werd to ya Mutha!"