callie rocked you at2:08 PM

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Hey All-

This is just a quickie for now..You all like quickies don't you??? Don't act like you don't!
*laughs*

OK...as you can see I have fallen in love with NEOWORX people! and I am adding new things to my site, so I can make a real dollar investment to this company so- please be patient as I play around and add things- delete things..This is also a way for me to learn new blogging skills...

As you can see I am getting visitors from all over the globe!

Italia- Ciao and Graci
France- Bonjour
Canada- Eh!
US- well....Holla!

OK all..I will post again after lunch ok????
Peace out
callie

callie rocked you at10:46 AM

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Wednesday, November 29, 2006

You All, the dreaded letter was in my mailbox when I got home yesterday.
"Dear Ms._________, This is a reminder that your annual Colonoscopy is now overdue.Please contact our offices to schedule your next Doctors appt. for outpatient testing services."

The Hell I will people! Look- this is what they did to me that last time- *click* on the highlight text. ANAL EXPEDITION.... People....let me just say that being a woman, we are- at least I am used to having people poke and prod and stick things all in my vagina...However I must interject when it comes to someone threading a plastic hose through my ass and possibly to my throat...

I went through this experience 3 years ago, and never went back... Although I was told I had to have it done each year because of their findings..I digress..I don't think so... See this is what happened to me... I had been sick- and I had all of these referrals to see certain specialists.. The last recourse was this procedure..And who none other to do this??? Doogie Howser... He was a young doctor, tall like he should have been playing basketball instead of playing with peoples butts.... I scheduled my appointment for the procedure, and went to the office to pick up my *kit*...OK....*kit* of what to do with this??? It was a bottle of liquid, a pack of suppositories, and a pack of laxatives... What am I going to do with all of this?????? She gives me my kit and a piece of paper with instructions... One thing that I notice is- *Start at 3:00 pm*

Ok- no worries. I get home and fumble through my kit and decide..Take the liquid first. If that doesnt work- the pills..Last option- suppositories... They didnt tell me that the liquid tasted like Castor Oil...It took a few hours for me to do the half of the bottle...My son on the other hand thought it was funny watching my gag and hurl in agony...A few hours later, I found myself dry heaving from my butt hole- with beads of sweat pouring down my face begging God to take me home. I struggled at 9pm to take the rest of the liquid shot mix, and shall we say the rest of the night was history. It was soooo bad I had to put a sleeping bag in the tub so I could make it to the toilet without mishaps..I didn't get any sleep that night, and checking in at 6am the next morning was not any better... Upon getting into my room- the nurse brings me my little peek a boo gown with matching footies...She then tells me she will be back to start my IV...So here I am in this bed, watching tv- waiting...An hour later, she comes back and does my IV...I then decide that was the time to ask...

"So, what really goes on with this procedure?"

People right after she finished I was in tears....bawling tears... All I could remember her saying was- tube-anus-intestines-long-plastic-hours-anus...By then she hit like a panic switch to the nurses station and another nurse and my doctor came in to try and console me..I begged-pleaded..Even told them they had the wrong person.... After they calmed me down, I was whisked away on my stretcher to another room.....The nicest young man was in there..He was so nice...He took some more information from me and jotted it on his little clipboard chart *which by the way were decorated in rainbows, butterflies, and I Love Duran Duran* He smiled and asked me if I was scared...
"yes...very..." I started to cry again..He then takes my little hand and says- "You will be fine- I am going to give you something to help you relax." He gave me something in my IV but I think fear was kicking it's butt because I was still keyed up. Another room...I am wheeled into another room...THE ROOM PEOPLE...the room with the Tv monitor, the operation tray- the cold frigid room...They help me onto the main table and I lay down...This nurse comes in and she is cathy damn chatty wanting to know my name, all about me....She then pulls out this machine and some coiled device- all the while she is popping chewing gum and talking...I sit halfway up and ask-

"Whats that?"
"Oh baby this is the tube we are going to insert into your rectum and I am hooking the camera device so the doctor can see whats going on."
Here we go again- I only heard certain words, and this time I am in a crying hysterical fit.. She hits another panic button, and the same nice man from before hurries in and smiles *he is always damn smiling*- he tells me not to cry- gets my hand with the IV and...............................

I have someone standing over me shaking me....
"Wake up, Wake up"
I wake up and I am in my room....
"What's wrong???" I ask...
"Nothing honey, time for you to get dressed.. We called your ride and they are on the way."
"So- does this mean I don't have to do this???" I am happy..groggy but happy...
She laughs- "Sweetheart, we already did it..You have been in recovery for 2 hours now." My ride comes, takes me home, tucks me in bed and sleep away I did...Until the next afternoon...

The Doctor didn't tell me that after the procedure what ever they did and injected hardened my bowels inside...7 suppositories later, all was well again..... Yes they did find something... Polyps..
7 of them... They were benign... (7 is a great number)

Get SCREENED....cause you never know.......and if anything- request what they gave me...You will *feel better*........

callie

callie rocked you at2:02 PM

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Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Good Morning peeps-

I have nothing....*nada* good to write about this morning. I am living a boring life..I know..you can say it... I could talk about how FAB Prison Break was last night. I could possibly talk about how sexually frustrated I am.... I could talk about how irritating it is to get a clothing magazine in the mail with cute items and in parenthesis it states:

"For sizes 14-26- Just For You"

So- now women that are double digits are no longer- curvy, plus sized, we are now "Just for you" sized... Classic I tell you... I could talk to you all about how my stomach is bloated because that time of the month is coming my way.... I can at least thank God that I can actually time activities around it...You dont think so??? See...I have it narrowed people..I am *finally* getting to know my body..Which is cool to say from my feeble minded point of view.. The days of the 17th through the 25th normally are my days of ovulation...... Day 3 through the 9th is my time of the month. it used to be the 10th through the 16..but it changed when stress and weight loss took over....Go figure... I could talk to you all about how my weight loss is going... Well, I have a total of 20 pounds left to go... Although I am still upset cause my mid section will not flatten..so yeah that has me bummed..But I am wearing a pair of cargo pants that I love... Only problem is when I got half way out the door, I noticed they are loose and are kinda falling...Instead of my going back in and changing, I just try and stick my tummy out more, to keep them on. Today would have been a good day to wear panties, in the event they fall. I am just kidding...No I'm not...

Ok! Web sites of interest.... Check this out people! I think it is the neatest thing, and it is free!
Just click on the bold text right here ~~~~~~> Where Do You Want It?

Also, I cannot hyper text this one because of it's nature and all....But just fill in the blanks....
extremerestraints dot com.....Check out the moving machines..LOL that is all I will say.... For those of you, that cannot load yahoo chat or other chats expecially from work- go here- CHAT
Just click on chat, and tell you other homies where to meet you..You don't need a password or anything just create a name and choose a room. I know...to much time on my hands.

So- tell me something for a change!

callie

callie rocked you at8:54 AM

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Sunday, November 26, 2006

I was cleaning out my closet his evening out of sheer boredom mind you, and I pulled out my keepsake box and found myself fumbling through it... I found first of all, news clippings from when I was in high school as a high rawkin thespian *yes people I rawked the stage many times from Musicals, to dramatics- From Les Miserable- to Godspell...Don't hate!* I have an old 45 of Debarge with the hit single "All this Love" which by the way is a bust a gut story. My son one time was being nosey and saw it and he was dumbfounded!


"Mom- this is the biggest cd I have ever seen- where do you put it!" Yes my jimminy crickets- he doesn't know what a record player is.... But one of the many things I found today was a memory of good thoughts... You see I have 6 post cards from when I went to Canada a few years ago.. I befriended this guy who was born, raised and lived in Ottawa Canada... After 5 months or so of lots of chatting online-phone- he invited me to come up, and well, I am a energetic muse and I hopped a plane and went... He picked me up from the airport with a bouquet of flowers in hand, grabbed my luggage and whisked me off to his apartment that he shared with 3 other roommates.... I had one of their rooms and the bathroom- and it was all so quaint..Nothing fancy, just quaint and comfortable... For the 4 days I was there I went sight seeing, got lost in Quebec while looking at country houses and fields, sat in on a meeting of laws at the Parlimant Building- which was cool because they all had the same white poofy wigs on, and so much more..

What *really* was a highlight for me was my friend inviting me to meet his parents and his older brother... We drove for at least an hour in the middle of no where. And there in the fields was this little cobblestone looking house. It was small- and yet the location was most beautiful. Open lands with bits of snow, cows in the pasture....I walked in and this woman, so chubby and huggable came up to me and hugged and kissed me on the cheek... She escorted me into the main room quarters and introduced me to the rest of the family. They thought it was a joy meeting someone from Georgia...a black person at that...I learned that everything said the word *eh* followed... "Ms. callie would you care for some tea eh?" "Ms. callie you thinks you'd be likin to move here eh?" As I sat on the sofa, I did a scan survey of the surroundings... In the kitchen area there was a big black pot bellied stove, and the sink had flowers and herbs surrounding it.. There were cabinets that were old and what seemed to be hanging half on half off, there were tiny ceramic ornaments settled on the tiny fireplace mantle.... And quilts...I am a whore for quilts...They were everywhere! My friends mother offered me home made biscuits and cookies with jam.... "I'm sorry- we are not as fancy as you are probably used to eh?" she smiled at me...

"Maam, please don't apologize... I am sorry that I am not able to experience such wonderful hospitality in Georgia, as you all have graciously given to me...." My friend offered to take me walking and told the family we would arrive back shortly in time for supper.. Before walking out the door his mom, started shouting- "Charles, she can't go walking in the cold in those sandals, eh- the poor childs toes are sticking out eh- she can wear my galoshes eh!". ( I wasn't wearing sandals..I was trying to be cute in my high heel shoes) I followed her to her room, and she pulled out these huge boots and a nice warm pair of socks....She wrapped a scarf around my neck and tied it as if I was a little girl... I went for my walk and listened as my friend gave me the history of his family, the house, their land.. We saw a big patch of grass that was smashed..."That there is where an elk or moose was layin eh." We walked, and he talked and I listened... Before long it was supper time. Hot chicken soup, and biscuits, and tea...and of course more cookies.... Before long, I had become so comfortable and relaxed sitting in the main room- I found myself dozing, and woke up to find myself wrapped in a quilt that my friend put over me while I slept...

"Are you awake now?" "Time to get you back to my place eh." I got up, folded the quilt back and straightened out the pillows on the sofa.. Every one wished me well....Charles's mother came up to me and gave me a big bear hug...."I be thinkin my son is smitten with ya eh?" she beamed...she handed me a small sack and kissed me on my cheek..."Now, whenever you don't feel no hospitality in those Georgia parts, you be comin back here eh?"......I shook my head in agreeance, hugged her for a while and left.....My friend and I kept in touch for a few more years after that.... He often asked me when I was coming back, and I always said soon...But I never did...Stupid things got in the way...Life.... We strayed pretty much after that and lost touch......

I took the invitation to return for granted.... I should have gone again....I really had no reason not to. I just didn't do it... I guess, that is why I am the way I am now... I don't want to miss anything... I try and do whatever I can to see and participate in as much as I can and not waste one single minute of the day...Perhaps that makes it hard for a relationship where I am concerned... I guess in my own way- I am high maintenance. I cant find a guy to keep up..*laughs* but......I think that is on my agenda for next year along with everything else... Here is the list thus far-

Skydiving again (which by the way can be scratched...it wasn't that much fun for me)
Tornado Storm Chasing for a week
Tahiti
Back to Hawaii
2 weeks missionary work... *You all I am really wanting to do this... I am trying to raise the funds... I was once selected to do ESL- English as a Second Language in Dharmasala India to Tibetan Refugees, and I have been interested in going to Africa....So we shall see...*
and of course another Cruise- Alaska, and going back to Canada....

Of course all of these are tentative... But- it's the goal... Ok..so I am sure you all are bored out of your wits right now..So I will end this and just hit the hay...EH?"....LOL

callie


PS... "what was in the sack? More cookies.....eh"

callie rocked you at9:46 PM

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Saturday, November 25, 2006

This post of mine today may come out as full force to some of you, however I just had to get this off my 38D chest. Political Correctness May not Apply...Therefore, In all sincerity if this posts upsets or offends you, then click out as soon as possible- for I am not caught up right now in what is prohibited or not....

Let's Begin...

This incident about the Michael Richards *Kramer* situation is what Bernie Mac would say "Thats some Buuull!"
It is now being reported that the gentleman he lashed out at- are not only wanting an apology, but monetary compensation.... OK....Let me think on this one for a moment and then reiterate for my own sake of comprehension.... You went to a comedy club...You were causing a disturbance-the comic lashes out *inappropriately*- you get upset and leave, the comic realizes he inserted more than his foot in his mouth, the comic is trying to make amends, you now come out to identify yourselves, and not only demand an apology from the Comic himself face to face *which is fair* but you also want money because you were....what?.......

Did I just bump my damn head? Because me- personally if I could go back up to this day and sue everyone that called me a nigger, I would be rich. I would not be working a job with no insurance because I need to work. Now- supposedly, the gentleman that are suing, has told their attorney who is also expressing that the clients are *deeply troubled and that this kind of incident should not be tolerated or given to anyone.* OK Rocket scientist...How do you go about the rest of the world being able to sue those Black Comics that use the word? Or...what about the Musicians that use that word...OR better yet- what about the Politicians and Sports Coaches- What about Bosses-Employees..get the picture? Should they be compensated monetarily "Hell NO".....Take your apology and roll with it.. You are not the only ones that have been racially discriminated against... It happens all of the time...It just happened to my girl Diva a few days ago.. You don't think she was hurt, upset, saddened? You don't think I felt that way when a landlord that had an advertisement for a House for Rent, told me to my face when I went to speak to him about it, "Sorry, if I had known when we spoke by phone, that you were a nigger, I wouldn't have asked you to come view the house." You don't think that shit upset me? Oh- but let me just sue everyone that does though..... And for those of you that think it still doesn't happen, think again...This is 2006...

I asked a black male friend of mine today what his thoughts were...And you know what he told me.....

"Nigger means ignorant
Nigga means homie- partner
Negro means ethnicity"

"It's ok if Negros- call each other Nigger, Niggaz....But it isn't ok for anyone outside that ethnicity to do it"....Ok...so....because I am not all that smart- "You mean it is ok for blacks to call each other that anytime-anywhere- but it is humiliating to have someone that isn't black to do it? Is that correct?..."

"Nah Nah man- see, if anyone one you know says it- its cool, but if you don't know them, and they say it- it's fighting words..."
"So- once again, its cool to say if the persons are black- as long as they know you- and vice versa?"
"Nah man- if you and I are on the street or going to the grocery store, and some black guy says "What up Nigga"- then its on!"
Well why is it on?
"Because I don't know him."

OK- that helped me understand alot... *NOT*..*laughs....People, racism has been around a loooong time..and it will continue to prevail... When little polls come out of How to end racism...Don't even bother.....The question that should be asked is how can we be more tolerate of others that are discriminating to us....Not us as a specific group of people, but as humans...... Look around....We are so proud to say America the beautiful- the melting pot..And yet when cultures and ethnicity and all of those other specialities start to melt- well we now are trying to separate ourselves..Kind of hard to do when we are all mixed in the same pot isn't it?

To the young men that felt offended.....I am sorry that you had that experience, but to request or demand a financial gain for something that we all go through- even the ones that do not even recognize it- well....*scratches my head* does it really make you a winner in all of this? Does it vindicate the many that go through this day in and out? Can you really take the money, spend it frivolously, and then look at yourself in the mirror and say- I deserve this?

Yeah- thought so....
callie

callie rocked you at10:43 AM

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Friday, November 24, 2006

OK- Sorry to come back so soon- but I just wanted to take a *poll* of a sort... Of course it is mainly open to women, BUT Men have it at too because I have heard you all would do the same thing.....So- Here is the question.. And YES you can log in ANONYMOUSLY to post your answer..... and please identify if you are a man or female..If you are caught between both worlds - you are on your own.

The Question is:

Would you have sex for money?

OK.....let's put it in this criteria-
You are single
You use precaution and safety
They are nice- clean upscale people with no drama of blackmail or anything
It's the same person from time to time....

Now- I am not promoting prostitution.. I am simply asking a question from a poll in a magazine... I am always reading something worthwhile aren't I.... And then I was thinking about it this way..And once again- I am a deep thinker and I always find myself in trouble because I analyze and stuff like that....

You go out on a date
You have drinks-dinner
Majority of the time it is one person paying for the other (unless the date is beginning to suck and you both offer a dutch settlement)
If you are digging each other sometimes it then turns out to be a a one night stand....

So......didn't you just get paid for sex?

So....answer the poll why don't cha!...

callie rocked you at1:27 PM

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Good Morning People.

I do hope that you all had a spectacular Thanksgiving. As for me, I did not indulge very
much in the food eatery department, but I know that I had to pop a few colon cleanse capsules
to be on the safe side...
I am currently battling the flu- or not even the flu itself, but some type of bug. I was fine until
I had to make a mad dash to the grocery store on yesterday- and some guy decides to deliver the whooping cough epidemic behind me, without covering his mouth... O-My- Gosh..You know he about got decked right? But- I kept mah head and my cool and hurried up and got out of there...Only to have to repeat going back to the store 2 more times for the remainder of the day.

Other than that- all is well in my hood... I have been working out some things and have decided that instead of me dating, I will fantasy date...You know how like *Ms. Elastigurl has her fantasy football league?* Well, I am putting together a fantasy dating league.. And thus far it sucks..My former fantasy was Seal....but he and Heidi are like so in love and having babies- that he has kinda forsaken lil ole me... Then of course there is Dijimon Hounsou with his Hershey Bar colored skin...*sighs* I just want to lick him all over..... But of course, I am sure he is all wrapped up in his movie career and all... *Whisper Edit-

Dijimon, look- if you are into blogging, puleeze stop by my door and knock and enter...I so *heart* you, and I would be a good girlfriend, errr...lover...errrrrrrr...what ever you need.. I can't cook African Food, but I have mad skillz with southern cooking... And I am versatile. We can go out and eat whether it be posh or waffle house I am there...And Dijimon, I so want you to talk French to me- you know the language of love when we are getting busy- but when Momma gets into porn star mode, that has to go out the window because I want to know how Momma is rocking your world in English...And most importantly..I know that in your culture a woman that can produce boys for the husbands is a plus...Baby I have junk in the trunk! I can pop you out some kids...Come holla at a girl ok???*

Sorry all, but my hormones just had to let that out.... Other than that- I am at work day after Thanksgiving, and I am bored as all get out. Someone text me- or call me- or email me...

PS... That Guy- hope your Thanksgiving was a good one..And please let us know *me* if there is anything that can be done for your squad sitting it out in Afghanistan as Christmas time is approaching and I would like to help spread some cheer.

love to all- and peace
callie

callie rocked you at9:42 AM

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Monday, November 20, 2006

Hey All-

I know I know, I suck with Friday ShoutOuts right about now don't I ? I mean it's not like you all really look forward to that.
Anyways- Just wanted you to know that first of all I have switched to the Blogger Beta..That means that some of you have added my link and it will not show up-probably therefore you now have to re-add it. I have had to do that myself with a few of you when I changed templates.

Second of all, I am going to do a slight Hiatus... What does that mean you ask? It means my Jedi Friends, that I am going to have to *Ghost* out of here for a bit. Why? Well, I cannot really go into details because first of all it's a damn shame...Second of all because this is something that I have to work out on my own per se'......I am at a point right now, that I have lost focus on some things, and most importantly on myself... The good thing is that I can admit that yes- I am going through something major and I cant fix it...The bad thing is that in order for me to be truly happy in myself, I need to refocus on finding me again... I know I may not make any sense to any of you right now...I don't make any sense to me...However- know that all will be well....and sometimes we just have to reroute the course in order to finish the journey.

So with that...Let me go ahead and give you all my belated Friday Shoutouts...And I will try and Keep my composure.....

Diva- In such a short time, may I say that your grace and beauty is such a joy in my life and of course those you touch. You are such a divine inspiration to me with so much talent and tenacity.I am honored to have met you....and to have you as a friend. I will keep in touch...and I will definitely be visiting your site as I always do... New Orleans may have displaced you momentarily, but I my friend have embraced you forever.

Robert-DQuixote- what can I say that you already don't know? Thank you for your spirit...your love.

That Guy- We grew up together, we shared alot together..You had to find your own path. I know that you would have climbed the second floor for me..I know you..I never forgot..I am so proud of you for all that you have achieved..I am even prouder that you have taken a responsibility to perhaps lay your life on the line for something you believe in...You are courageous, and strong...and I love you....

Elastigirl *smiles*- "I am a superhero without super powers."

Trailer Trash Moma- *laughs* Get on dat der cb of yers and send an SOS out to da BBC...you know the ones..Bubba, Brewster, and Cleetus...Bring a 6 pack of Budweiser and jump in der pick-up and drive on dis way. Momma is gonna need sum backup to do a suthern whoop ass yer here? Git Er Done!

Sheets- Although it may seem tough, you are not alone. You are beautiful and strong...such character and strength.

Jonathan- Albert is right. *smiles*

Marc- you have been giving a second chance to start over..What are you going to do? *smiles*

And to the many others- my Phen group ( I am so proud of the weight loss challenges we have put ourselves on, and prouder that we are accomplishing those goals) and the rest of my readers, I wish you all a wonderful Thanksgiving Season...

callistre

callie rocked you at8:58 AM

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Friday, November 17, 2006

Hey ALL-

You will get your full-detailed Funky Friday Shout Outs on Monday-
as I am having a moment right now and not feeling it
So In order to prevent myself from typing a lame- tacky-wish you
all well over the weekend, I figured I would chillax- get my head
and thoughts in the right place and then I will holla back at your
freaky butts! Don't Hate!

Until then-
Laterz!

callie rocked you at4:16 PM

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Thursday, November 16, 2006

callie rocked you at8:34 AM

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Wednesday, November 15, 2006

callie rocked you at9:22 AM

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Tuesday, November 14, 2006

callie rocked you at9:25 PM

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callie rocked you at11:05 AM

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Saturday, November 11, 2006

I went to the grocery store to pick up 2 large cans of ravioli, ( for the boys)some batteries (for my headphones-cd player) you knuckle heads...*laughs* and as I was standing in line, I decided to spare an extra three dollars and I purchased a magazine... I normally don't do that but there was an interesting article on how to decorate on a budget...At any rate- they always have a ladies section that is in some sort of relationship quarry... This particular question was something rather of:

"My husband loves porn movies and I don't. I think they are disgusting and he wants me to watch them with him..What do I do?"

Well, of course the first thing that came to my mind was- "they won't stay married long.." And then I looked at my own situation..It saddened me...I spoke with a male friend of mine last night via chat, and he is such an intellectual spirit, some of his questions posed I could not really answer because I had to ponder them..... I woke up this morning staring at the ceiling, and the answers came to me, in which I am posting now, while they are still fresh in my mind.... Whey Shake in hand.... along with a lemon crunch luna bar!

Here

We

Go

The tide is changing....and I look at my relationships and at first I carried alot of guilt of trying to understand what I did wrong, what I could have done to make things better...so on and so on..And this morning, it was like, it wasn't you...It was them...I am an artistic creature. I am and can be aesexual as well.... I have been known to go for years without sex...And don't think it isnt because I do not like it..And that kind of bugs me...That was the line my ex husband would run and tell people..."She stopped having sex with me, because she doesn't like it." Well, it never dawned on him that he BORED me...as many times as I told him- tweedle dee could not put it together...... Which is why my title for this blog is What a Girl Wants, What a Girl Needs...Women today have become dependent on themselves...not because we have to- but because men have forgotton how to Give us what we want and need........Example, sex is sex......You find someone attractive, things happen and then it's like.....Wonderment afterwards...The What If's.... We or shall I say "I" am a complex creature...I am also a creature that feeds off of men that can *Mentally* stimulate me.....because of my complexity I get bored easily and in that it can be a challenge for some men..and I am perhaps guilty of scaring men off because of that..... Women today *want* that stimulation.....We want,need, and to feel we are wanted and needed..that excitement, that thrill...And damn if we are going to settle down relationship wise, we expect that along with certain things..There are some that believe a man should take care of them from financially to spiritually.....Some men see that as a gold digger, but the issue is deeper than that..We want an assurance that a man *the* man in our lives will do what needs to be done as a provider.... Make sure the electricity stays on, make sure there is food to eat, roll up your sleeves once in a while and help around the house- things of that nature..For alot of us, it isn't about the jewelry or the "what you can do for me" attitude... it is about what you provide and do for yours to ensure that you are a Man as a whole.......Some Men today- have forgotton what PASSION is.....And I hope he does not mind, but Enigma.......Enigma, Enigma, Enigma.....I cannot say enough about my friend..... (By the way- his link is to the right)....I wish more men that I have known in my life had taken classes from him....That man has passion! He is captivated by a womans mind......He thrives on keeping women unbalanced with never ending thoughts....There have been many times, that I have had to take cold showers from reading his thoughts..He has the type of passion that if you were in a grocery store fidgeting in the oranges aisle, and he came up beside you and started getting into your mind, you would squeeze those damn oranges so hard you would have freshly squeezed orange juice ready! Men- THAT is what we want! We want to be captivated in our minds- and once that is taken watch out because your woman has now become the porn star you have always wanted... I see that about myself... Of course, I hate being alone..Of course I hate not having a partner...But I cannot keep settling for someone that cannot mentally set off my electrons..And yet why did I or do I settle? Is it for money? Ahhhh no....When it gets to points where I have had to work 2 jobs while being married to provide for the household, you can believe I didnt marry someone for money...Is it because of the sex? Ummmm no...because sex can be used as a tool or a chore depending on the situation at hand for me sex became a chore ....Well what was it then? It was the beginning of mental captivation- that was immediately turned off faster than a light switch once the contract was signed...... I hear alot of that by men.....and women......No side is greater than the other. "After we got married everything stopped...." thats what is said right? I have said it....... Women....or *me* thrive off of mental stimulation all of the time....You can be ugly as sin, blindfold a woman and come up to her and whisper in her ear, take her to a different place in her mind, you dont even need to touch her..You can tell by her breathing, her sighs what she likes, what scares her...Where have those men gone???? I think now, I am kind of getting mad because- what has happened now or what is going on now- for men to not be men anymore???? Like the guy and his wife in the above mentioned opening..I see this a few ways...First you dont know who is telling the truth...But for shits and giggles let's just say.... This guy knew his wifes distaste in porn....Let's say he knew *why* she didnt like it, and if he felt the reason was a non big issue- he still felt hope in his desires so he takes it a step further......Our thinking process as womenat times is- "Ewww....he finds those women sexy, ewww...how could she do this or that...Ewwww...I could never... it's wrong" Well yeah- of course she is not going to be into it if she is just coming from tending house, putting kids to bed, and she comes to the living room-bedroom and sees an Al bundy look alike spanking his monkey...Yeah she is going to be grossed out.I would be... BUT- if he had entered her mind in a way of after she has completed her duties as a mother-housewife, and she comes around the corner and sees her house lit by candles, an offer of perhaps a bath in which he bathes her, and then he starts entertaining the notion of him wanting to watch the show with her, and during that time he is *stimulating* her mind, reassuring her-comforting her......It would have been history that night...He would have gotton to work the next day- and she would have lied to him on the phone explaining something about a fire- Just to have him come home so she could ravage him! Where are the men that can do this???? and more so want to??? Whatever happened to stimulating a womans mind by writing her a story or sending her a poem? I am an artistic woman and I am a story, poetry word reading literature freak..Hell I read Sheets and Enigmas stuff just to get off!..*kidding* Just kidding.....But my statement is that- How I would love to have someone pour their soul onto a piece of paper and to tell me that is how they see me, how they feel or how I make them feel about me..Sheets did a poem on his entry a few days ago...He had women melting the pc screen...PASSION i tell you...Enigma has women probably sending him panties in the mail from all over the world..PASSION.... Men- this is what a Girl Wants, what a Girl needs...and once you can captivate her mind, the possibilites are endless.....

And now that I have finished sucking down my chalk shake, and eating my dry luna bar, I am going to go shower and cry because...Damn...you men need to come back around to finding joy again in the way a woman smiles and looks at you, or comforts you when your beer buddies can't........ That kind of Passion and joy, only comes around few times in your lives.....other than that- we all are just hoplessly lost.....

callie rocked you at9:00 AM

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Friday, November 10, 2006

It's Friday You Blogger Addicted Pimps and Ho's! I am thrilled because momma has hit the limit
this week..So much so I may have to gulp one of those Guinesses that I have had hiding in my fridge for the past month.....

Ok- so let's get to the nitty-gritty dirt of the day shall we? I rode to work this morning listening to the radio and it was all about Brittany and Kevin... Someone...please explain to me how this man thinks he is going to take care of her kids, when he cant even take care of his other two? Kevin, listen to momma for a moment ok? Stop trying to sit at home shopping- and go back to dancing...Shar called and said you still owe her child support that you have never ever bothered to pay....Justin Timberlake called and said he wants his Rolex back that he lent you for your non sold out concert that went bust. Guess you better start groveling and ask Britt to hire you back as one of the Fly Boy dancers..Or if that fails I am sure her ex Justin will need a dancer for his "Sexy Back" number...*skank* "Take it to the Bridge!"

MJ!!! You are finally coming out of hiding in hopes of showing us "Who's Bad"...Well I only have 2 words to say.. "GO...YOU..." Just keep in mind a few tips though MJ....

1. Leave the Jerry Curl, S Curl, Leisure Curl, and any other hair curl back in the day man...Weave is in!
2. Don't do the flying rocket ship thing... I would hate to think some angry parent is still pissed at you, and while you are floating above the crowd they pop a cap in the tank and down you will go.
3. Leather Jackets, Rhinestone Studded Gloves and Penny Loafers are a no no... We now prefer to see half dressed people prance on stage- especially at your rate of ticket scalping.
4. Bubbles, and any other specialty pets you may have confiscated from Never Land are non entry on International Flights.Don't give the po-po something else to add to your past rap sheet.
5. And finally...MJ.....Stay the hell out of the sleeping machines, and surgeons chairs for any more body modifications or reconstructive projects...Boo, you were all that back in the day when you were stalking Billie Jean...errrrr or is that the other way around? You were so beautiful with your pearly whites and that jerry curl superman forhead droplet when you posed with ET...Now you are becoming Mr. Potato Head with added options of using silly putty and play doh....Dude, don't let them jack you like a wax statue....Just cover your little pale skin up, and lube your lips with Burts Bees chapstick.....Call me if you need some more advice ok??? But listen, do not call me collect from the Middle East.. I don't have extra billions stashed like you do....Got it? Shaamon!

Whitney and Bobby...Bobby and Whitney....Whitney, gurl you look good now that you let the old New Edition Go...I am proud of you...Now you get back to singing and doing your thing..And Whitney, touch base with that little gay guy that you took a picture with at that mini mart when you went to buy a pack of smokes...Remember??? He sent it out to everyone and dogged you out about how bad you looked and how your breath smelled like ass...Email that queen and ask him, "Who smells like ass now?" Ps...instead of Mariah Carey, I would really thrill if you did BodyGuard part 2.... "Ohhhhh I wanna dance with somebody!"

And now....For the Friday Shout Outs!

Diva, Diva, Diva...you have a little pickle going on don't you? No Worries Mon....do what you have to do..It will all work out.

Swaff- I have not heard from you in a week...hope things are well...Let me know.

Twist......- all I can do is smile...Have a great one............

T- forget you! *Post Edit- I text T the other day and asked if she had plans for Thanksgiving..This was basically the conversation...*

Me- Hey, you have plans for Thanksgiving?
T- ummm not that I can think of why you cooking?
Me- sort of but yeah would you like to come over?
T- it depends....are you cooking a real turkey or are you serving Tofurkey?
Me- screw you T....and no...I was not cooking a Tofu turkey, I was ordering a real one.
T- alright...I will let you know...

T- if you and your guest want to dine on appetizers of spam and crackers, and your main meal consists of Peanut butter and jelly that is on you...Don't beg me for any leftover spinach dip or anything else got it? I got your Tofurkey.........heffer....*laughs*

Sheets......It has been decided, Diva, T and I are taking a road trip to your area to have a nice chat with your soon to be ex wife..First we have to stop at the Home Depot and pick up a few items we will need...you know...like a crowbar, some type of bondage devices to mobilize a person...things of that nature... I am driving, they are riding shot gun..Our schedules are clear, we have ATM cards and gas in the tank..Say The Word...*winks*

And to you others.....Have a grand weekend, and be safe.............
ciao!

callie rocked you at10:49 AM

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Thursday, November 09, 2006

A courier walks in to deliver a package to me today...
"Sign here" he quirps
"Who is the package for?" I ask
"I don't know, there is no name."
"Then how do you know where it needs to go and who needs to sign for it?"
"I don't know."
I grab the parcel, and notice the ATTN TO section, with Lookey here- a name and a building number!....
"Sir, this is the name of the person that is awaiting for this parcel, and you need to take it to this building number listed right here" I told him with a smile....As he walked off I muttered to myself, "How in the hell can he get paid good money to deliver stuff and he can't deliver because he can't read..I am in the wrong profession...Jackass, here's your sign."

I get a call.... and these I must tell you are the highlight of my day- with the exception of the guy that just dropped off flowers for someone and told me I was pretty and brightened his day... *Thank you Lord, for the glow from the colon cleanse I just tortured myself through!*

"Thank you for calling __________________ How May I direct your call?" *Insert Cheerleader greeting here*
"Yes, I am calling about my bill, and I don't want to talk to another customer service rep, because they cant help me, they read from scripts and say the same thing, I want to speak to a manager, this is ridiculous..."
*Insert Interruption by me right here*
"Sir, first of all I am terribly sorry for the inconvenience, and please do not take offense to what I am getting ready to say, but it helps me to understand exactly what your needs are, so I can assist you alright?"
"Ok, go ahead Maam..."
"Now, you spoke with someone in customer service about your bill correct?"
"Yes"
"And they were not able to help you and now you wish to speak to a supervisor correct?"
"No..a manager can't help me because they all read a script. I want to speak to who is in charge not another customer service rep!"
*Insert Dr. Phil with a hint of sugary Dr. Ruth here*
"Sir, excuse me for asking, but how is your problem to be resolved if you do not ask to speak to a manager or Supervisor on duty? They are above the reps you have been speaking to, and can over ride whatever issues you are having...Would you like for me to personally get one on the line for you?"
"I am sorry Maam, I did not think of that, yes please thank you!"

*Instert muttering here as I am transferring his call- Dude, it isn't even 10 am yet, I haven't had my pill, and I am still sore and hungry.*

And Last but not the final- As this goes on all day-
"Thank you for calling ___________________ How may I direct your call?"
*silence*
"Thank you for calling ___________________ How may I direct your call?"
*silence*
"Hello? how may I assist you?"
"Oh Christ! I am so sorry I thought you were a machine- you are a live person right?"
"God Bless you my child, yes I am a live person Sir, how may I direct your call?"
*insert his embarrassment laugh here along with mine.*

In relation to yesterdays Sex Question *which by the way you guys suck.....* The question or poll rather was- 90% of women do or have done this/what during SEX?* Why you guys send me emails is beyond me, but I got 5 emails from guys telling me the same thing... Women Fart... First of all I beg to differ....Women do not Fart we queef.... Second of all you all were wrong.. The answer was *SLEEP*.....which I find hard to believe, because if it is that boring, I am pushing you off of me, or faking a great orgasm, just to get you finished so I can roll over and perhaps never speak to you again for boring me and wasting my time...... So to all of you ballers out there...Here is your sign....

VIAGRA and a BOOK on HOW to Rock her World so She doesn't nod on you during SEX.

Love

Me....................................

callie rocked you at9:02 AM

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Monday, November 06, 2006

Hey All-

CHECK THE LOOK WHY DON'T CHA!

This is so me.. I was getting a few complaints that my other blog was not showing up correctly...I am thinking it is because of the beta formatting going on with the Blogger system, which enables some to view, and some to well damn speculate I guess....Anyways- this is more me.... She is the tribal girl I love...

Oh- this my dear friends is what greeted me in the middle of the night on Saturday.....

Him-"Mom, I threw up"
Me- jumps straight up in my bed and looks at my son.... "Where?"
Him- "In the bathroom"
Me- "Ok baby, that's where it needs to go, go back to bed."

Little did I know when I got up the next morning to check on him, when he said *In the bathroom* it meant in the bathroom all over the floor... So yeah, I was up mopping vomit for half of my Sunday prior to church. I guess he and his friends did not think cheap pizza, extra extra cheese, popcorn, soda, milkshakes, and fig newtons would not wreak havoc on ones stomach.....Yeah, I bet he knows now... Castor Oil could not be given fast enough. *winks*

How about we have another bathroom bomber issue at work? I reported it this time... How can you pee all over the floor and not even bother to clean it up...nasty I tell you, just funky. And I am not talking about the funky cold medina kind either.... And what kills me, some of these people ask for a restroom when I get them registered right? they are perhaps here for an interview.... Well, if they go to the restroom, and you extend your hand to greet your guest knowing they just walked out of the latrine , take a look at the hands ahead of time to notice any water droplets.......That is your clue that you do not want to eat anything they may bring to your next company function.

My weekend, or shall I say the remainder of it , has been ok. I was able to do my confrontation phase that I had spoken to you all about on the last entry.... I will just leave it at that... I went back to the doctor on Saturday and I lost another pound and gained 2 pounds of muscle- which is good... However I have slacked for 2 days due to my period starting, and I have been craving chocolate like a mofo, so I just picked up a box of raisinets and a box of pads and I am happy now....By the way.......... LADIES.............Be careful when trying this product: Menses Cups. I bought a box of these a few months ago, because I am a big advocate of Holistic Health, Organics, and things of that nature.. So I had heard about this product, read up on it, and bought a box for like 3 bucks..... Putting it in is simple, comfortable and it feels waaaaay better than a tampon and pad... Getting it out...Now THAT is a bitch.... basically, when you get ready to change it out, you just slide your finger in and hook around the band and pull it out..... Ok....no problem....ONLY for me, it kind of vacuumed and got lost. Not that I am loose mind you, but I have strong muscles..Anyways, that is another story, get your head out the gutter, I told you I had skillz... Anyways, I had to lay on my bed, spread eagle and freakin bare down like in pregnancy and pull hard to yank it out... Oh my Gosh! What a freakin mess...Because with these devices, it basically fills like a cup, and I don't think that's healthy....Instead of sucking it out on cotton, your catching it in a cup, and then if you have a vacuum vagina like I do and cant get it out, then it spills inside you during that process...So...yeah basically, just stick with the cotton rocket and diaper. Geez, the things we go through to have a life.

You guys, I am so sorry about the Funky Friday Shoutouts! I was in a melancholy mood, and I was not feeling it...But I am somewhat better now- so I tell you what, how about I just do it today?

DIVA- when did your man decide to come down and stay with you??? you have some things going on. Hope you get it all settled. Call if you need me.

Da Swaff- You are the man... I love ya...... you and your battalion keep your head up and watch your six!

Twist.......*smiles* yes, absinthe does make the heart grow fonder..... looking forward to my photo session.

Sheets- your so awesome.. Thank you for your jokes and your sweet spirit.

Viking- where do I begin? *smiles*

T- we never made it to the club....darn you...you are missed.

And to anyone and everyone else.......you know the drill.....

PS.... PEOPLE....take a moment to VOTE tomorrow....yeah I know.....But guess what, it's part of my right as a citizen of this great country....Exercise yours!

ciao bella!

callie rocked you at1:27 PM

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Wednesday, November 01, 2006

callie rocked you at11:11 AM

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